Working Things Out

My comments on the odd things that happen in this world

I’m Magic May 23, 2010

Filed under: General,Good Mood — terrygreene182 @ 8:03 pm

Seriously I am, for the first time ever I am sitting in the garden, in the setting sun, writing this. I feel like a magician. 10 years ago this wouldn’t have been possible yet today we take it for granted. Modern life really is the best. I even have Spotify open, that’s how cool I am.

Anyway, moving away from rambling on about the old days I’m going to put down some ideas that I had during the week(ideas that I can remember that is), the Britain’s Got… post will either come tomorrow or later on tonight or not at all this week, for once I had a life on a saturday night.

My Ideal World

That’s right folks, I’m going philosophical on your arses. I say philosophical because I know it is never going to happen but can’t you let a boy dream.

So my ideal world is essentially communistic, not how it’s been in the past, but how it’s meant to be, what it actually means. Here’s the plan.

  • Everything is free, houses, phones, ipads, whatever you want it’s free. (Size of house is dependant on the size of your immediate family I’m thinking.)
  • Everyone has to work. What I’m thinking is everyone works 2 or 3 days a week so that there is space for everyone to work on a rota type system.

That’s all I’ve thought through for the moment, it’s been in my head for a while but that second point only came to me this week. As I said let a boy dream. Any more suggestions to this ideal world would be much appreciated. Let’s all come together and make it happen. Again as I said let a boy dream.

Spotify

I know you all probably know about it but I have only just entered the world of Spotify and what a brilliant world it is. I have been spending hours on this listening to music that I’d forgotten about. I would post a link up to my playlists but I’m not sure how to. I will say however listen to Hot Club De Paris, Future Of The Left, The Voluntary Butler Scheme, Emmy The Great, Metronomy, Le Reno Amps, Aqualung and Stornoway.

The England Flag Rumour

Rumour being what it is, as in false, not true, a lie, another phrase which means much the same thing. God knows where it started but it was fuelled in no small part by paper that has the audacity to call it self the news. That’s right the non-thinking person Daily Mail that is The Sun.

The actual story is that a police force suggested to a couple of pubs where there is often trouble during the world cup to possibly ban football shirts during the tournaments. That’s football shirts, not England shirts, not England flags but football shirts. To these suggestions the landlords have said that yes what the police SUGGESTED was a good idea and that they were going to give many of their suggestions considerations.

If your going to believe this rumour then maybe you should focus your anger on the fans causing the trouble and not on the innocent bystanders who don’t care what flag you’re waving around but do care when violence erupts.

Thanks for reading this hastily put together post. I shall now wander upstairs, crack out the Cointreau and coke and watch Money on BBC2, catch it on the iplayer, it might be alright.

Britain’s Got… blog to come tomorrow I’m now thinking. If I don’t remember then give me a nudge on here, twitter, or facebook.

Advertisements
 

Sunday Night Blues May 16, 2010

Filed under: Comedy,Good Mood,Politics,Review,TYSIC — terrygreene182 @ 7:50 pm

I don’t know what it is about sunday nights but I get grumpy. I usually end up snapping at a family member and having to sit upstairs. So today I took the pre-emptive strike of moving up stairs directly after dinner(lovingly prepared by me) and will now spend the rest of tonight watching crap television. That is, after I’ve written this clumsily cobbled together blog of ideas.

Politics.

So we have a new government, conlib, condem, libcon, however you want to describe, and already it has caused controversy by the fact that it is two seeming polar opposite parties who have now come together for the next five years. The right-wing hate it, the left-wing hate it, but the fence sitters are surely loving it. Saying that they probably haven’t even noticed anything happening and probably didn’t even vote, the scum they are.

After the initial shock of what had happened, and once I had got past how creepy it was to see Clegg and Cameron in a garden laughing and joking, I finally managed to get my head in a balanced enough place to make my mind up. Although I would rather have not had the Conservatives in power at all, at least while they are there the Liberal Democrats can hopefully stop them from doing any of their more right-wing plans such as repealing the hunting ban(I hope).

For me David Cameron will never be the prime minister and for the next five years, or however long until the two parties start arguing, in my mind this country will have no prime minister. I know it’s a bit of a childish thing to do, but what is the point in living if your going to let go of childhood completely. I still talk to myself when no ones around, I talk to my animals as if they can understand me, and whenever they house is empty I do indeed dance like a champion.

What I’m saying is, don’t lose hope and faith with the Liberal Democrats, love them all the same, if you did that is, and keep supporting them. This is bound to give them a better footing for next time round and who knows the (spits on floor) Sun may even start supporting them at the next election. Although if that happens I shall then be voting for someone else. Maybe the Greens, I like them.

https://i0.wp.com/www.eauk.org/public-affairs/election/images/GP_logo1234.jpg

What’s the difference between a bus and the BNP? A bus has got seats and is going somewhere.(Joke via Billy Bragg, our lord and saviour)


Productive Weekend.

I actually managed to do some decent things this weekend. I finished reading a book that had been sitting in my bag for months, and I’ve begun reading another.

The book I finished was Black Butterfly by Mark Gatiss. The third, and final I think, in the Lucifer Box series, and a brilliant end to what has been a wonderful set of books. I started reading them by chance, me being the type of person who buys a book because of the cover(or in the some cases the pages, see Popco and The end of Mr Y), and from the moment I opened the first page of The Vesuvius Club I was hooked. With a brilliant lead character in Lucifer Box, who is portrayed in such a charming and charismatic way that you instantly fall in love with him. These three books are not only well written, but are also truly funny and cause some laugh out load moments, which cause some odd looks while on the bus, and even moments of real tension. This is the first book that I have ever read while clenching my fist and willing the characters to victory. I urge you, if you have not yet read them to give them a try.https://i0.wp.com/img1.fantasticfiction.co.uk/images/n28/n142252.jpg

I’ve now start reading the brilliant Richard Herrings “How Not To Grow Up”, one chapter in and it’s looking good. Available for £6.99 on Amazon, and is currently top of the comedy charts, so let’s keep it there. Also while your buying that why not pop over to http://www.gofasterstripe.com and buy everything, not just Richard Herrings stuff but everything. It’s worth it.

https://i1.wp.com/static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/arts/2002/07/25/RichardHerring_3.jpg

Also this weekend I finally sat down and carried on with the work I started months ago on some sketches. Credit Crunch BBC is my working title, and if anyone knows of a good place to send these sketches to get them seem, then any help would be greeted with nothing but graciousness, perhaps even a pint if I ever met you.

 

I’m Backing The Liberal Democrats May 5, 2010

Filed under: Good Causes,Good Mood,Politics — terrygreene182 @ 8:48 pm

That’s right, I know it’s a big surprise but it’s Liberal Democrats all the way, I even just got an email from Nick Clegg, I know it probably got sent to every one but it had my name at the top so it made me feel special.

Dear Terry,

This is my personal guarantee that I will use all the support you give me on Thursday to deliver fairness in Britain.

We need a fairer tax system. I will use your votes to cut taxes for those at the bottom and in the middle and close the loopholes for those at the top.

We need to support our children. I will use your votes to ensure extra funding for schools, to cut class sizes and give all children a fair chance.

We need to clean up politics. I will use your votes to reform Parliament, to deliver a fairer voting system, protect your freedoms and give you the right to sack corrupt MPs.

We need a new economy. I will use your vote to split up the banks, get them lending again, invest in green infrastructure and so create jobs.

This election campaign has shown us that millions of people want us to do something different this time.

Politicians should work together to solve the nation’s biggest problems. That is why, whatever the outcome on Thursday, I believe we should be prepared to work together to fix the terrible state of our public finances and ensure economic stability.

These are the key steps to a new, fairer Britain. Give me the power of your vote and we can make it happen.

Together, we can make the difference.

Best wishes,

Nick Clegg Signature

I’ve always been a liberal me, not in the sense of I’ve always supported the Liberal Democrats but in the sense that I’m a uber liberal person. I prefer to see the good in the majority of people and don’t like seeing people treated unfairly. I believe the richer members of society should support the poorer members. I believe there needs to be electoral reform so that everyone’s vote counts. I believe there needs to be a complete overhaul of the financial system and that it needs to be changed and not fixed.I believe everyone is equal. I believe the press should not be involved in the government at all.

On all of these points the Liberal Democrats agree.

*

I also got an email from my current local MP today, he really doesn’t want my vote.

Final Election Statement By

Bob Spink:

“If elected, I will not keep Brown in Power.

Unlike the big parties, I’ve kept all my promises.

I’m right wing of Cameron on immigration, the EU,

school discipline, crime & punishment.

Political Parties don’t always tell the truth or keep promises, so why vote for them?”

So vote for Bob your tried and tested safe option.

Official audits show our MP Bob is the most hard-working, cost-effective of all MPs.   Don’t reward his decency and hard work by dumping him for an unknown.

If you think the big parties always tell the truth, reward them with your vote.

If not, vote Bob to get rid of Brown and make them listen to you

We need our experienced, campaigning MP, Bob

(not someone controlled by the party which voted for 5000 houses a few weeks ago)

to fight for our green belt at the Public Inquiry on 22nd June 2010.

FACTS:

Castle Point is a two-horse race.

Conservatives will form the next Government and

you can keep your good, hard-working, local, loyal MP.

Don’t waste your vote.   Vote Bob

Don’t be fooled again by political spin.

It has been a wonderful time working for you; sincere thanks, however you vote.”   Bob

Well he’s now lost the vote from me that he never had.

So this has been election week, I’ll see you on the other side. Tonight we rest, but tomorrow WE FIGHT!!

VOTE LIBERAL DEMOCRATS!

https://i2.wp.com/static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2010/4/30/1272656647561/Nick-Clegg-campaigning-in-006.jpg

 

Feeling Healthy April 11, 2010

Filed under: General,Good Mood — terrygreene182 @ 8:10 pm

Today I forced myself to get up early and went for a 3 hour walk and, strangely enough, I feel better for it.

I’ve got to that stage where I realise I need to lose some weight and get myself into some form of okay shape, just to give myself a little bit of self-esteem, so I thought the best way to do that would be to start of exercising properly by taking a walk. A walk which I will definitely be doing again next week.

After tumbling out of bed at 10 this morning it took me a while to get my brain in gear. You know what I’m talking about, it happens to everyone most mornings. That point where you sit slumped on the edge of your bed, with your lips jutting forward in a cavemanesque fashion. It took me half an hour to even think about going out.

After finally getting the energy together I finally packed up my bottle of drink, made the night before I might add, I’m like Ray Mears I am, always prepared, although I don’t look like a 12-year-old boy, and headed out, but not before grabbing my coat due to the clouds that had formed over my house. This was a mistake though as five minutes later all the clouds had gone and I was left holding my coat in the beautiful sun shine.

Headphones in and the country park beckoned. I do love country parks because they are the only places where people actually smile at you and say hello, especially when, inevitably, one of their dogs runs up to you and looks at you with its stroke me eyes, and there is always such odd breeds of dogs that you see than when you just walk round the streets.

Midway through walking up one hill I looked to the top and just began wishing there would be a bench at the top, and I was happy to see the beginnings of a bench forming over the top of the hill. This bench has now become my favourite bench of all time, not just because I needed it after the hill which was a lot harder to walk up that it looked, but because of the message engraved on it. “Doris H. Stood here and wished there was a seat” Although it did make me think that maybe she’d had a heart attack on that spot. The only message that would have been better than that would have been “Alfred G. Kneeled here cottaging and wished there was a seat”

After another half hour of walking I had the delight of another hill, but at the top of this was another treat. COWS!! That’s right, they’re that good they deserved two exclamation marks, I know what your thinking in your mind “Please tell me, did you get a picture of the cows, please tell me you did?”

Of course I did. Although that first one scared me as it’s eyes followed me as I passed it and then I had to climb over one of the fences with the horizontal slots of wood. I’m not sure what they’re called but I’m sure they designed by someone who hates the elderly, believe me I had to wait several minutes for an old couple to get over while I had to do the polite smile and laugh along with them in a way that’s like, cor who woulda thought it ay, while thinking I hate you, why aren’t you in a home. Back to the cow though, it just watched me climb and really thought he was waiting for the right moment to just charge and crush my leg.

The second cow is my friend though, I named him Constantinople.

Finally after another half hour of walking I decided to make the trek back home. It was the most uneventful end to a walk of my life, plus it was mostly downhill so it went quite fast.

Next week I’m going on another walk, although I think I’m going to find somewhere else to go, vary it a bit.

Thanks for reading.

 

Productive Late Nights March 29, 2010

Filed under: General,Good Mood — terrygreene182 @ 2:07 am

I’m one of those unfortunate people who come alive at night, as I write this it’s 2:17 in the morning, if I wasn’t writing this I would just be lying in the dark thinking “hmm I should be asleep right now” for several more hours. The plight of insomnia has been with me for years but I work round, I function pretty darn well on 2 hours sleep. Ok, for the first hour of so I’m dead to the world, but as long as I don’t walk out into any roads I’m generally safe for this time, and then I wake up.

The annoying thing about this affliction is that point when you wake after a few captured hours of sleep and think to your self “you know what, I’m going to get in from work today and go to bed early because I’m sure to be tired” and then when you get in your brain goes hey, no need to go to sleep, you could watch the Top Ten Cops doing the Funniest Celebrity Soap Endings, or some other crap like The Bill. Oh still to soon, no I’m sure the one person that watches it doesn’t read my blog, they’re probably out there now writing some fan fiction about Sun Hill.

In less than 12 hours I will be sitting down at a children’s production of the Pirates Of Penzance. I feel I should point out that my younger brother is in the production, I’m not just going to watch children ruin a musical for kicks, no, I’m not that kind of guy.

Now I haven’t seen a live production in some time, mainly as I stay away from anything Andrew Lloyd Webber does. I’m not saying there is anything dodgy about him, I’m just pointing out there’s Oliver!(that’s right Oliver! not Oliver, just make sure that you yell it down the phone if you book tickets)with all them children, The Sound Of Music with the Vontrapp Children, and who do we think are going to play the munchkins in his latest venture The Wizard Of Oz. That’s all I’m saying, I’m not gonna make the link for you, mainly because it could be libellous so I won’t say it.

All I will say is it’s his fault that we are going to get nowhere in this years Eurovision. Honestly, he should have chosen the next songwriter to take it on, that should have been written into the deal. So what I’m trying to say is PETE WATERMAN HAS FUCKED US!

I’m sure some of you watched the Choice For Britain, or whatever idiotic name they gave the sham, it was awful. Every contestant, be they solo or in a group, would not even be adequate enough to get work doing cabaret at a holiday camp. It was as if they hadn’t even been through any form of audition process before they went live on BBC1 primetime.

Worst of all was the lies coming from the judges, with all the same lines of “you made that your own” and other such crap. Were these three deaf! Could they not hear what the rest of the country was hearing and vehemently tweeting about every act being just as the next one.

Then came the song!  Now I was just going to write about how bad a song it is and the fact that it sounds like a flat version of the 80’s hit Kids In America, but then I thought, hey, why not look at the lyrics

How do I begin to imagine all the happy faces I’d like to see?
The final destination, the sounds of celebration
If I could find the opportunity

I’m not even going to try had to read into these lyrics, I’m just going to flat-out abuse them.

You want to see happy faces and sounds of celebration, well then walk up to Pete Waterman, go to give a hug, and then kick him in the groin. He may be a pensioner but he needs some payback for Musical Youth, Nik Kershaw, Steps, Jason Donavan, Rick Astley, Sonia, and anyone that won, or got any form of career through Pop Idol.

So i wonder, who can I turn to?
Who can make these wishes and dreams come true?
And with you there beside me, loving hands to guide me
Anything is possible to do

Now I’m sure he wrote this with another older gentlemen, which gives this verse a kind of dirty feeling that just makes you want to scrub yourself bleach until the pain goes away.

I can feel it coming together
All the love been working so very well
There’s nothing left to do now, gonna see it through now
Don’t wait and let the future write itself

Oh god make it stop, I don’t want to think about Pete Waterman coming, let alone him and someone else, coiled around each other in naked ecstasy, both expelling their music destroying love juices, with their sucking lemons face on.

Baby, if you bring the sunshine, I’ll bring the good times
Just add your laughter, it’s happy-ever-after
I don’t know about you but that sounds good to me

Right I’ve just been sick in my mouth, and now reading the rest of the song through it gives a whole new meaning to the first verse. Obviously Waterman and friend want to make love in front of Europe so they can see, what they think will be, their smiling  and cheering faces.

NO ONE WANTS TO SEE IT PETE, KEEP YOUR CLOTHES ON AND YOUR RELEASE FACE PRIVATE!

(I think I’ve found it)